The Official Obituary

Big Red, 6

Big Red passed away last week on Friday, November 14, 2008 as a result of a tragic accident at his workplace, KDDK, in Evansville, Indiana.

A service was held the same day, according to his religious beliefs. Burial took place later that day with parts of him being interred in Steve and Rosemary's trash cans, and the vacuum cleaner, according to housekeeping beliefs.

Big Red was born in 2002 in Hershey, Pennsylvania where he was a lively child, melting people’s hearts, but not in their hands.

Mr. Red chose not to work in the family business, but instead went to work as an M&M Mars spokescandy alongside his friends Yellow, Green, and Blue.

In the fall of 2006, Big joined the KDDK family, working as a candy dish, he could always be found on Rosemary’s ledge. He brought comfort and chocolatey goodness to all his co-workers and friends.

He is survived by his son, Red, Jr., and his grandchildren, the Mini M&M’s.

Memorial contributions can be sent to Chocoholics Anonymous.